Saturday, December 9

soul clock

self portrait, canon digital rebel xt

Today I was sitting at my friend's station in her salon ready and waiting to get my hair color some fabulous shades of red. Since my hair is so fricken long and thick, it takes 3.5 hours to do, so I am thankful for the plethora of cool magazines she plops on my lap. For some reason today, on my way out of the house, I grabbed one of my favorite mag's that just came in the mail and brought it with me to the salon. I've never done this before and hardly thought twice about it. That is until I opened up the third page and saw an article about fertility. I knew right when I saw the word "FERTILITY" in huge green letters that I was supposed to read this article today.

It was written by a gynecologist who also had difficulty conceiving. She practices both Eastern & Western philosophies...so right up my alley. The article was about what she first tells her patients when they come to her. She immediately brings awareness to the importance of their emotional state throughout this process. Most of her patients that come to her have been through the ringer and are emotionally spent, frustrated, degraded and utterly confused. Pretty much where my husband and I were about the time we finally found McMiracle.

The wisdom she shared that struck me to the core was how when a couple is labeled "infertile" that this word alone adds much stress and emotional upheaval.

The Power of Words.

She first tells her patients to stop calling themselves infertile and to say instead "conceiving our child". Infertile sounds so final, so black hole, so "never" and I didn't realize the affect it has had on my husband and I until I read this.

She also tells her patients to not look at their clock as a "biological clock" but as a "soul clock". A couple starts trying to conceive when their souls tug at their hearts to create a child. Soul clocks never stop ticking.

The whole article was laced with positive energy and hopeful strategies. It was so refreshing. I thought at the end of the article, I would read how the author finally got pregnant. Instead, she shared that she adopted a boy, meant to be born in a different womb and is in every sense of the word her son. Since then, she's dedicated her whole practice to helping couples fulfill their "soul clocks", on whichever path that works best for them.

So, I was left with the reassurance that I am not infertile but conceiving our child, that my soul clock is still ticking and that I will be a mother someday, regardless of how it happens.

All this yummy encouragement and the bonus of fun reddish hair.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

How beautiful...and i completely agree with her about the power of words. I think they have more power than we give them credit for. It's the energy behind the words, I think, that send out a vibration. You are on the right track, I can feel it!! You are a mother. Your baby just isn't here yet. I think the baby has a soul clock, too. And you are just waiting for your clocks to synchronize!! :) I admire your strength and perseverence. You are a gem!

December 9, 2006 at 11:52:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My sister went through the exact same thing and they were blessed one day with a beautiful baby girl whom they adopted. She has been the light of their lives. My mother and dad adopted two boys after 8 years of trying, and then 4 years later starting having their own- 4 biological!
It seems like timing is eveything in the universe and like rubyslippers suggests, it's all a matter of synchronization...
You are blessed and will be blessed someday, I am positive of that. I am glad that article gave you some comfort.

December 10, 2006 at 6:24:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That was such a touching thought. It goes to show that we all put such finality on EVERYTHING we do. Everything has a deadline, a time-frame, a stopping poing. And that just isn't how life is lived. Here it is put so eloquently! Thanks for sharing!

December 10, 2006 at 6:47:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am so glad that you were able to recieve such lovely encouragement. What a kind, optimistic way to regard the struggle to conceive! Thank you for sharing this. Love to you and your soul clock today.

December 10, 2006 at 8:45:00 AM PST  
Blogger Darlene said...

That is such beautiful and peaceful thinking, the right approach and rings true with my heart. I especially love the 'soul clock'

Each child that comes into this world arrives in his/her perfect time. How shallow we are to decide such small windows of opportunity.

"Soul clocks never stop ticking"

Just beautiful and full of truth. I'm so glad you were blessed by this, my lovely sissy :)

I love you with a full hopeful heart!

Big sissy
XXX Darlene

December 10, 2006 at 10:59:00 AM PST  
Blogger Georgia said...

I love the idea of a soul clock! Very cool. I also like the idea of how sometimes someones child is meant to be born from someone elses womb. My little sister is Adopted out of Korea. My parents trie for years and years to get pregnant after they ahd me. My mom did get pregnant several times but miscarried several time and had an eptopic pregnancy another. In the end they made the decision to adopt my sister and she is soooo meant to be in the family:) I am not saying that this is the way it should happen for you, I am just sharing my family's happy story with you.

Love to you!!!

December 10, 2006 at 11:02:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love this whole idea, how empowering and encouraging (which must be like a breath of fresh air!) It's true, we're all on our own 'soul clocks' and I think that's an amazing way to look at the journey to conception. Sending you lots of baby thoughts, and holding out hopes and prayers for you to be a mama to a boho baby. It will happen.

December 10, 2006 at 6:32:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love it. Thank you for sharing, hon.

December 10, 2006 at 7:50:00 PM PST  
Blogger Admin said...

my new blog:

December 10, 2006 at 11:09:00 PM PST  
Blogger Left-handed Trees... said...

"Soul clocks never stop ticking"...this is such a powerful statement, such a powerful thing. I KNOW you are going to be a miracle of a mother someday soon.

December 11, 2006 at 2:57:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow. glad you found me thru andrea . your photos . words . struggle . beauty! YIPPEEE . good vibes sent to your soul clock and to conceiving your child . mommas to the core . shall be mommas . its inevitable . may beauty shine on you and days be filled with fun . love . and knowing! much peace . much xoxo . denise (denisemihalik . com) :)

December 11, 2006 at 4:24:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think with anything that you are trying to create--be it art or a child--it is essential to keep infusing yourself with different perspectives that keep your mind fresh and open.

Don't you love it when that information comes to you when you don't expect it? In the form of a favorite magazine?!

December 11, 2006 at 8:52:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh, deni,

i just CANNOT wait for you to become the mother you were meant to be, one day. you will be fabulous, i know it - your loving, positive, creative nature just oozes out of your every word. i'm glad you found some inspiration in the words of that article.

December 11, 2006 at 10:21:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I only know you through your blog, but from what I can tell, you have a beautiful soul clock. And instead of ticking, it is flowing with joy.

December 11, 2006 at 10:26:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

beautiful you beautiful soul beautiful boho.

December 11, 2006 at 10:41:00 AM PST  
Blogger la vie en rose said...

woo-hoo! look at how the universe is working in your favor giving you the messages you need at just the right time! and what a hopeful, powerful message it is!

...and when do we get to see the red hair???...

i love you sweet one!

December 11, 2006 at 11:11:00 AM PST  
Blogger bronxbt said...

you are what you say... it's really that simple.

wonderful and moving post this AM, boho. good to hear you're focusing on positivy-goodness versus the alternative.

thank you for always sharing your wisdoms. jes' like the spoken word, you'd be prolly surprised by the power of your written word on others...


December 11, 2006 at 11:25:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Boho,
Nice post! It's nice to now that we are so strong inside and so many times we had no time to notice that. These kind of subjects should be more usual in the modern magazines.
Very nice blog.

December 11, 2006 at 3:28:00 PM PST  
Blogger PaintingChef said...

A friend directed me to your blog and this post is just amazing! My husband and I have been "conceiving our child" for going on 2 years now and we've just recently added acupuncture to the mix. Anyway, thank you for what you wrote, it gave me a great perspective. You seem to have a really beautiful soul and I look forward to visiting your site again!

December 11, 2006 at 4:49:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am so glad you are receiving gifts from the universe, which continue to help you on this journey.
It is amazing the gifts we ask for that come true when we need them most.

December 11, 2006 at 7:19:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Another gift of perspective and truth from the universe. It is as we always say, when you open yourself up to the universe and all of the possibilities, we are answered, often times in many different forms. You have been working to find balance, and you are finding gentle and beautiful reminders that are helping you to do just that.

I am so happy that you are being bestowed with these gifts, as your soul deserves this and more.

Love to you..xoxoxoxo

December 11, 2006 at 9:05:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what a wonderful article. so true that you were meant to read it! keep on conceiving your child!

December 14, 2006 at 10:53:00 AM PST  
Blogger deb said...

It was meant to be for me to read your post. Truly. We have been "conceiving our child" for six years.. just hearing those words makes such a difference in how you look at everything. I don't talk about it much with many people because most people don't understand so your words are comforting. You should read a magazine I just discovered called "conceive". It's full of positive thoughts and stories.

May the new year bring you every little thing you wish for.

December 22, 2006 at 12:43:00 PM PST  

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