Woven

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Boho Boy and I just arrived from the long drive home. I still find myself wondering if what transpired this past week really happened or was it all a dream. When a trauma like this happens to someone you love, you suddenly feel like you are part of a dramatic film with thoughts like, "this only happens in the movies". Well...where do film writers get their ideas from? Real Life. Hello real life.

Being in the ICU every day with Mark was surreal. Time stood still. Then it flew by. Sometimes it was in slow motion. After we'd hear new news from the doctors or nurses, we'd all have to digest it amongst one another. Some of us were stronger when the other was weak and then we'd alternate. Our moods in balance. Yin and Yang. I always had my eye on my sister Darlene. I so badly wanted to protect her from her fears. To put a shield of comfort around her so that she only heard the positive.

I am tired and rejuvenated all at once. Tired from all the scary~ness, Mark's pain, the uncertainty, lack of sleep and roller coaster of emotions. Rejuvenated because I am so in love with my family and I am full of hope for Mark's recovery. I feel such monumental things are going to happen in his life as a result of this. His story has touched thousands of people all around the world and it has touched us. I see him moving mountains. I saw it in his eyes. It will just take time, hope, patience and determination. We have to help him find these things within himself.

When in the waiting room with my family, words of comfort were not always necessary. As Darlene sat there, knitting her scarf to keep her mind busy, silence was just enough. Just being with your family is enough. I never felt the pressure to say all the right things. I was hoping they could feel my quiet strength because I felt theirs.

I learned that something as serious as this knits family together like a woven scarf. As I watched Darlene move one loop into the next, I thought of our family. That we were holding one another together through this. We were holding Mark together. Each of us by his bedside were bringing him closer into us, pulling his spirit back into the circle of our family. We will continue to wrap around him and pull him through this.

We are all intricately woven and our strength in numbers will gently guide him to those mountains so he can start moving them.