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Thursday, April 19

master cleanse ~ day five


pipes on the side of a building in Seattle, canon digital rebel xt

This morning and afternoon I felt fantastic. I had made about 72oz of the lemon drink and poured it into a jug to take with me on some errands. I was surprised at the energy that seemed to whiz through me. I was singing in my car, smiling and even said out loud to myself how happy I was with my marriage, my photography, my family and friends. Yes...I laughed as I caught myself doing this.

I've been afraid to exercise while on this cleanse. I wasn't sure if it would leave me wiped out or starving or both...so for the past four days I had refrained. Until today. I thought I had so much energy that surely I could give it a go. So I went to my YMCA Mind & Body center and did the eliptical for 20 minutes and then did 20 minutes of weights. I didn't want to over do it, so I shaved 20 minutes off of my usual 60 minute work out.

Oh
My
Gawd.

I am not sure how anyone exercises on this cleanse or perhaps it was too early in the 10 days for me to do so but as I write this I am feeling so ill. On the drive home from my workout I totally crashed mentally and physically. My stomach feels eternally empty, nauseous and I am completely weak. Nothing seems to be helping. Not the lemon drink or peppermint tea. I even sucked on the pulp of a grapefruit. Not sure what is going on. Did my workout trigger a huge toxin release? Am I not supposed to work out on this diet? The master cleanse pamphlet says to go about your daily routines as usual (meaning if you typically work out, do it) but I haven't found the energy to do this to the fullest.

I've been battling feelings of being a failure and that I am weaker than others on this cleanse. Battling feelings of wanting to take a shower and curl up with a bowl of soup. But I won't. I am committed and this is a test for me and my will power. If I gave up now, I would deeply regret it. I've had a habit of not finishing some things in my life and I want to break that pattern here and now.

I looked at this picture I took in Seattle today and it cheered me up. It reminded me that I am cleansing my "pipes" and just as this beautiful flora is growing through the top of them, I will grow in so many ways.

My sweet friend Pixie said to me yesterday "i love that you have the cajones to do this-childbirth will be a cinch for you". I don't think she realizes how much this is keeping me focused. Even if she was kidding. ; )

Must go on...

15 Comments:

Blogger Kirsten Michelle said...

"Must go on..."

and you will!
resist the temptation to compare yourself to others...what you are doing is not easy!!!
allow your body and mind their highs and lows, they will find their balance point.
you are strong and beautiful and inspiring.
...rest up, tomorrow is a new day!
hugs,
k

April 19, 2007 at 8:44:00 PM PDT  
Blogger jenica said...

girl, i loved that pic! so perfect for what you're accomplishing right now. you are stronger than you realize. and yes, i'm sure that you just went through a major detox today and tomorrow you should feel much better. even with the maple syrup in the drink, your caloric intake is WAY lower than what you would usually eat. so maybe your body just needs a little pampering, be gentle with yourself. ;-D

April 19, 2007 at 9:01:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Georgia said...

Ok... When you feel those failure feelings you can think of me and how I quit after a mere 10 hours ;) I am starting again this weekend... You give me strength babe!

I love love love that photo, it is perfect for this cleanse.

xoxox
Georgia

April 19, 2007 at 9:44:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Schmoops said...

You're halfway there angel.

April 19, 2007 at 9:59:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Dreamer Girl said...

DonĀ“t be to hard on yourself. You will get there, the count down has begun :)

Have a great weekend!

XOXO

April 19, 2007 at 11:10:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Susannah said...

MB, you have basically created the conditions for your body as is there was a famine going on, so it's completely natural that you would not have the energy reserves for exercise! be gentle with yourself, okay?? lots of resting! xo

April 20, 2007 at 1:17:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Lucia said...

Fabulous picture! I'm enjoying reading your journey on this cleanse. Keep with it.

April 20, 2007 at 1:31:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous acumamakiki said...

This is what I'd worry about with the cleanse - I feel like I'm too sensitive to everything sometimes!!
But I admire you for continuing forward. Even if you do decide to stop, please don't beat yourself up over it. You do what's right for your body.
I was looking in on of my books last night and there's a modified cleanse that a lot of acupuncturists use to detoxify the liver, especially during spring, the liver's season. You use the lemonade but there's other steps and it's 7 days. If you want, email me and I'll type it out for you. Be kind to yourself, you're doing a great job!!

April 20, 2007 at 4:22:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you go girl! we are all rooting for you and sending you endless love and support.

-an anonymous supporter!!

April 20, 2007 at 7:18:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Sam said...

You are half way there! Home stretch, yada yada yada! LOL.

Maybe instead of exercise your body and mind need rest.

Sam

April 20, 2007 at 7:22:00 AM PDT  
Blogger daisies said...

sending you hugs, you brave beauty

:)

April 20, 2007 at 8:26:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Colorsonmymind said...

Honey.....I am so proud of you.

I felt so freakin crappy in the afternoons and evenings when I added exercise-I also felt amazing the next am when I eliminated. I have read it speeds up the toxin breakdown and release so it figures it would feel crappy.

I am sorry you had a tough time and felt so sick. I imagine you are detoxing really well.

I read on teh message boards on mc numerous people talking about how tempting it is to give up when the cleanse is really working-because the toxins make you feel crap.

The good first half of the days kept me going. It was really hard.

You are amazing and wonderful and I know you can do it!

Great-beautiful pic-made me giggle out loud. Also love what Pixie told you. It is true.

Keep it up baby doll.

I am here.

Love you
toe to toe

April 20, 2007 at 9:56:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Regina Clare Jane said...

Gosh, it sounds so tough but I know you are so strong...
You're almost there- and what a story you can tell when you're finished!

April 20, 2007 at 1:02:00 PM PDT  
Blogger shinyruby2 said...

*giggle* Oh I got a lovely giggle when I saw this photo! Perfect :) And yep, you are so there! Keep going.. move along.. you are strong and inspiring and in fact, before I read this post I was just thinking how strong and inspiring you are on this!

Yay! Hang in there!

April 20, 2007 at 6:27:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Britt said...

don't feel too down..this is your first major cleanse and it's NOT EASY! definitely listen to your body and don't push it...sounds like you need to go a bit slower with exercising.

April 22, 2007 at 8:43:00 AM PDT  

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