Wednesday, November 28

soul song*

kate, swirly, andrea, jen, canon digital rebel xti

The last few days I've been thinking a lot about the idea of gently helping to empower my friends, family, loved ones when they share their hearts with me. Our instinct is to wrap them up and to save them, take care of them because we are nurturers. I think another way to nurture is to empower, to help them rediscover their own true voice when they have lost the ability to hear it clearly.

A dear friend had asked me some advice on how to stay connected to her body as she was feeling quite disconnected on many levels. I asked her what it looked like to her to feel connected. If she closed her eyes and imagined a fully connected being, what does she see? What is this person doing? What is she feeling? How is she loving?

I walked away from the exchange hoping that what she really needed wasn't a list of all these things she could be doing but instead permission to define her own individual experience of what that could be, not what my experience may be or has been.

I realize there is a balance with this. It is just something that is dancing around in my brain as I write this. I know sometimes we just need answers and ideas that we can find in a guide book, therapist or a trusted person in our life and there is definitely a time and place for that inspirational support.

My experience lately with a few book-gems and gracefully wise people in my life, is that this has been a reoccurring nugget that continues to surface; empowering myself, empowering others...and being empowered to find the answers within.

"To follow your heart is as simple as closing your eyes and listening to the rhythm of your soul song. Once you find the beat you will always walk in tune...". ~ Monique Duvall

Every one's soul song is unique in its melody. We can hear it. It's within us...but we have to allow ourselves those precious moments to listen.

What are the lyrics to your soul song?

Revel in this with me.


Blogger Unknown said...

it's so true. sometimes it's so hard to just close your eyes and listen. just today I have called all three of my sisters for advice when i'm sure it was inside me the whole time.

deep breath. I will stop and listen.

Thanks, loverly

November 28, 2007 at 12:52:00 PM PST  
Blogger Kirsten Michelle said...

As is so often the case, sweetie, I am leaving here today one step closer to finding my own beat.
I am so very grateful for your wise and gentle words...for your beautiful presence in my life.

November 28, 2007 at 1:09:00 PM PST  
Blogger Silvia said...

i was just wondering this evening how to be gentle with myself. when someone asked me to be gentle with myself the other day, i realized that i might not even know how to be gentle with myself. not know for sure what's to much and what's to little when it comes to expectations.

listening to the rhythm of your soul song might be a way of being gentle with yourself too, no? i've written the quote in my journal and as my head touches the pillow in a few minutes i'll close my eyes and sing a song.

as always, thanks so much for sharing your words & wisdom


November 28, 2007 at 2:20:00 PM PST  
Blogger Marianne said...

and this post has also reminded me why i love you so much. wise, loving and soulful... xxx

November 28, 2007 at 7:06:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Boho, I must chime in on a day the is nothing short of renaissance for me. I have been back in school (third degree, that sounds a little ominous) full time now for over four years. I pursuing, by way of English originally, a BS in Integrated Studies. I am marrying the rhetoric of my poetry with the rhetoric of modern dance. Today I presented my first modern dance/poetry performance for my "Language, Most Dangerous Of Possessions" class. I have dance in my bones and for reasons we all know about, I have refrained from following my dream; that is until I got back into school in '03. Anyway, I had a great experience, albeit testy. My sweet Julia-girl was in attendance and was absolutley icing on my cake-walk.

I'm actually writing for more important reasons than to only share my great accomplishment. I'm reading and hearing so many heavily laden accounts about feelings of melancholy, struggles getting out from under the cloud, just sadness, and gloom. I desire to recognize all the good, kindness, and absolutely genuine love and concern I am hearing laced in and through the struggles. People are reaching out to others, even in their own hour of painful struggle. I see the lovely intertwining going on as a result of challenges beautiful. I see the pain going on around us as catalyst for bringing people together. Adversity is never as odoriferous coming away as we projected it would be going in. I find when I sincerely embrace whatever I see in front of me with love and light, somehow the view shifts; normally doesnt go away but certainly looks different. Solutions also appear from unexpected directions.Looking anything in the eye is so much easier to recognize and assess when seeing "it" for what it is. Attempting to put an unreal face on a pile of do-do and then, oh no, being forced to call it what it is after I've stepped in it. The ease of back-stepping away from stinky stuff rather than having to clean it up.....well you get the gist.

November 28, 2007 at 8:50:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So often I want to have someone tell me what to do, especially when I'm in a flux, as I am. My song was so clear for so long and now the melody is different. I'm trying to listen, trying to accept the newness of it all, but I find it difficult and with change, I become inert.

I needed a reminder that my song is beating, I just need to find the rhythm.

November 29, 2007 at 4:25:00 AM PST  
Blogger MeowGoddess said...

A friend is someone that knows the song in your heart and can sing it back when you have forgotten the words

Thank you for re-mind-ing me!!!

Wishing you,
Peace & Love, Just Because,
Goddess Diana

November 29, 2007 at 4:55:00 AM PST  
Blogger Mindy said...

i love the idea of a soul song (sound so yummy to say too). so often ther is so much other noise that threatens to drown out these sacred vibrations. finding a way to really listen to what your song is telling you is a true gift. you help your friend do just that, and it such a wise and wonderful thing. your intuition is such a guiding star.

November 29, 2007 at 6:55:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"what she really needed wasn't a list of all these things she could be doing but instead permission to define her own individual experience of what that could be"

I adore this sentence. What a great reminder.

Hugs to you this morning.

November 29, 2007 at 7:20:00 AM PST  
Blogger The Passionate Palate said...

Boho girl - you have the right idea - our greatest power is to empower others. That was a beautiful post. It seems that my last few years I have spent helping and empowering others, and now I am in need of it myself. I long for nurturing friends to hold me, comfort me, laugh with me and cry with me. Reading your blog has helped me realize I need to find those friends, and that support network again. Thank you.

November 29, 2007 at 8:52:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

God Says Yes To Me
Kaylin Haught

I asked God if it was okay to be melodramatic
and she said yes
I asked her if it was okay to be short
and she said it sure is
I asked her if I could wear nail polish
or not wear nail polish
and she said honey
she calls me that sometimes
she said you can do just exactly
what you want to
Thanks God I said
And is it even okay if I don't paragraph
my letters
Sweetcakes God said
who knows where she picked that up
what I'm telling you is
Yes Yes Yes

from The Palm of your Hand, 1995
Tilbury House Publishers

November 29, 2007 at 8:53:00 AM PST  
Blogger meghan said...

Sweetheart - you empowered me with this post and another ;) You always write what I need to hear. I'm struggling with this - so so much.

I'm going to try very very hard to sit and listen. My body has been yelling at me for a long time, and I just haven't been paying attention. I will read your post again and try very hard to sit quiet and listen... you are wise, dear one!!


November 29, 2007 at 11:57:00 AM PST  
Blogger Martha-Anne said...

beautiful post. very empowering! i'm going to revel in this for awhile and get back to you.

November 29, 2007 at 12:22:00 PM PST  
Blogger E. Michelle said...

i love this post because sometimes nurturing becomes paternalistic-- maternalistic in the sense that we want to be needed so we like to love someone in ways that keep them little, and keep us defined. I want so much to be nutured towards empowerment.

November 29, 2007 at 3:14:00 PM PST  
Blogger Unknown said...

your blog is very inspiring!!

November 29, 2007 at 8:36:00 PM PST  
Blogger Marc said...

This pretty much steers my inner compass:

"Live to the point of tears."
- Albert Camus

Lovely blog, an enchanting discovery for me.


December 5, 2007 at 2:07:00 PM PST  
Blogger bella said...

this is very close to my heart.
in my work, my relationships, I have seen how quick we are to rush in and rescue, to calm, to make it better. And yet what I think we most yearn for is the space to be where we are, whatever that is, and just have it be seen and have it be ok.
To just be present is a gift. When someone will offer me the gift of just sitting with me, it is here I find my own knowing.

December 15, 2007 at 2:21:00 PM PST  

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