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Sunday, January 6

mondo beyondo part one ~ completion


superhero babe, andrea, canon digital rebel xti

I have meant to write this for a few days now, so I thought it apropos to finish it at the end of a beautiful vacation as a new work week begins. The first work week of 2008, that is.

Reflecting and completing the past year is so important to me, so here are my answers to Andrea's part one of the Mondo Beyondo list::

What do you want to acknowledge yourself for in regard to 2007?
This past year for me, for both my husband and I actually, was a lot about getting in tune with our bodies through our diets and being aware of how we felt when when eating (and drinking) certain foods. I am proud of myself for being able to gather all the nuggets of wisdom from my homeopathic doctor, acupuncturist and the plethora of books I read on nutrition to create a diet that felt right for me. It began as a path to create a healthy womb for a baby to grow and now has become a way of life for me to sustain energy, balance and health.

For the first few years of this journey I was a student and following the advice of my advisers but I really noticed a shift this past year when I empowered myself to look within for answers rather than at the outside influences in my life.

In regards to our journey to conceive it felt pretty huge because there are so many conflicting "solutions" or paths to take and no way is right or wrong, so it was really was up to me, to us...to decide what felt right.

This new awareness is a beautiful perspective that will carry me, carry us, into so many other areas of our lives.

Speaking of...one of the areas is my photography. I learned to embrace a new direction with my business and to let go of my original ideas of where I thought Bohemian Girl Designs would go. I followed my passionate heart and Boho Photography happened. It felt really natural and I was open and flexible to just go with it!

Another area of my life that feels pretty solid right now is my ability to not take things as personally as I used to (thanks to inspiration from the Four Agreements).

All of these bits collectively define one of the dooziest of doozies when it comes to lessons I have learned:: The awareness that I am the only one that is responsible for my own happiness.


What is there to grieve about 2007?
I forgive myself for being obsessed with charting, ovulation predictors, pregnancy tests, taking my temp and forgetting that making love with my husband is so much more than making a baby (even though this was more in 2006 than 2007, I still never forgave myself for it). I forgive myself for struggling with looking at or being near pregnant strangers. I forgive myself for feeling sorry for myself and having pity parties. I forgive myself for pulling a bit away from my friends that were mothers because it triggered sadness and feelings of failure in me. I forgive myself for being angry at my body at times. I forgive myself for worrying that my family was disappointed in me because I couldn't procreate as easily as they could. I forgive myself for those moments of feeling angry at God. I forgive myself for losing touch with my sexuality as an individual and in my marriage. I forgive myself for not going to yoga as much as my body needs. I forgive myself for neglecting my pastel art. I forgive myself for being a procrastinator with some projects I am working on.

I wrap all those parts of me that need to feel forgiven and hold them gently with an overflowing abundance of tenderness, respect, understanding and acceptance.

I grieve for my husbands father who passed away nearly a year ago today.

I grieve for my parents dog Daisy that also passed away not long ago.

I grieve for a few childhood friendships that are important to me and have drifted.

What else do you need to say about the year to declare it complete?
Oh sweet crazy fabulous 2007...there were times I never thought I could possibly feel this way but I am truly grateful for the emotion, the pain, the challenges, the connections and the lessons because today I can stand firm and look back with such clarity that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. That feels so absolutely freeing.

I close this year feeling more gentle with myself, more empowered, whole, strong and centered from the growth.

I declare you complete!

************************
Lil' side note:: If you're interested in hearing more on the topic of the journey towards my photography, the lovely Swirly interviewed me on her new delicious blog "Sparkletopia". You can read the interview here.

14 Comments:

Anonymous parisienne said...

I love your blog and I think it's awesome that you are on this journey towards health and healing. I couldn't help notice that your fave brand of skin care contains parabens, which as you may or may not know mimic estrogen and have been linked to breast cancer and infertility. Maybe not the specific product you use? Just wanted to point it out b/c it seems you care about all the little details that make up your life. Peace and joy in 08!

January 7, 2008 at 1:56:00 PM PST  
Blogger Boho Girl said...

thank you, parisienne!

someone had already mentioned this to me in the past on my blog (perhaps it was you?) and i ran to my bathroom to make sure the products i use don't have parabens. thankfully, they don't but i know a few of Mario's products do.

i already sent an email inquiring about it to the company.

i am glad we are all more aware of labels and ingredients.

take good care.

January 7, 2008 at 2:03:00 PM PST  
Blogger Martha-Anne said...

Wow. Your blogs never fail to inspire me, in so many ways and on so many levels.

January 7, 2008 at 3:15:00 PM PST  
Blogger Maggie Ann. said...

absolutely beautiful, magical, just like every other bit of you that you share with us.

i thought i would, finally, let you know that your blog is one of my 'sanctuaries', a place that i can go in the midst of chaos and feel safe and inspired.

thank you for sharing of yourself.
blessings upon you and yours.

i finally completed part one of my mondo beyondo today as well :)

January 7, 2008 at 6:08:00 PM PST  
Blogger the brady girls said...

that agreement... dont take things personally... changed my life when i accepted it into my life. it truly makes life so much more liveable. it got me thru my divorce & has stayed with me sense.

thank u for sharing the mondo beyondo w/ us all a few posts ago. ive shared it w/ many friends and family already :)

to 2008!... xoxo

January 7, 2008 at 6:33:00 PM PST  
Anonymous parisienne said...

No, that wasn't me that posted that before. I'm a first-time poster who stumbled across your blog while looking for info on fertility and healing. I really enjoy your photography, esp. your use of colors. It's quite gray here in Paris! Cheers

January 8, 2008 at 5:31:00 AM PST  
Blogger mccabe said...

hi lovely.

this is just a beautiful post...so much richness here.
and i love the portraits of andrea. so soulful and full of energy.

i also enjoyed the interview and this line particularly*
"I prefer to capture moments that are unrehearsed."

you are such a jewel...
i love being inspired by you.

love
mccabe x

January 8, 2008 at 9:27:00 AM PST  
Blogger Andrea Scher said...

i was really moved by your list of what you forgive yourself for...

lovelove

January 8, 2008 at 9:57:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Megan said...

just beautiful

xoxo

January 8, 2008 at 3:27:00 PM PST  
Blogger kim brimhall said...

you.
amaze.

xo,
kb

January 8, 2008 at 4:30:00 PM PST  
Anonymous ceanandjen said...

I finally took the plunge and wrote the questions down in my journal. As I wrote them down, my mind raced, but I am going to give myself some time to embrace this.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your heart...I don't know that I will be able to be so brave. :-)....but I think that as long as I do it, it will hold power.

Here is to that completion and so much goodness in 2008! xoxoxoxo

January 8, 2008 at 4:54:00 PM PST  
Blogger pink sky said...

there is a light that surrounds you. i am not sure what it is; i can not put it into words exactly, but i do know that this year it will be waxing full and bright!

January 8, 2008 at 5:50:00 PM PST  
Blogger Swirly said...

As always, so beautiful...love you.

January 8, 2008 at 10:32:00 PM PST  
Blogger Schmoops said...

i love that you posted this here. what a beautiful release from 2007. i know 2008 is going to see you shining even brighter, if that is possible.

loved reading your interview! too fun, and so inspiring... xoxo

January 9, 2008 at 8:26:00 AM PST  

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