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Tuesday, April 29

trying something new*


smiling me, canon digital rebel xti (wearing my delish superhero bulls eye pendant)

I started my monthly cycle today and it was the FIRST time ever that I didn't shed a tear as a result. Not a one. Actually, today has been a wonderful day full of other creative yummies birthing in my life and I've actually felt energetic and clear and hopeful.

Perhaps because I truly believe and when I say believe I mean not just saying it but actually feeling it...that it will happen. I will be pregnant. I just giggled to myself as I typed that out. I am not sure if I have actually ever written that here on my blog. EVER.

I. Will. Be. Pregnant.

You know...this is how I have manifested fantastic things in my life. I say them out loud very matter of fact. I FEEL them. I actually get to a place where I just feel and know it will happen. Sometimes it can be even more super cool when someone else is a negative nellie about it and yet I STILL have no doubt it is going to happen. I don't allow them to steal my mojo and stay in that empowered place.

I am not sure if I have yet been able to do this about getting pregnant. But I'm starting today and am going to nurture this space that I am in.

I feel happy and I am also feeling so grateful for those souls in my life that are rejoicing in my happiness rather than wanting me to be back where I was because it feels comfortable to them.

I even had a dear friend offer to be my pregnancy coach (similar to a life coach but with the focus on the emotional and physical process of trying to conceive). Isn't that a great idea? I love that she created this for me. I call her my BPC (beloved pregnancy coach) and she has been uber supportive with all the elements that surface.

I know some people reading this might be gasping a bit. Perhaps thinking..."oh no but what if she doesn't get pregnant...like ever?" And I would totally understand that reaction. Partly because you want to protect my heart from disappointment and perhaps also because it is safer to be more logical about such things. But I am going to try not being logical about this for a while. I am going to try something that has worked for me in so many other areas of my life and play in this positive pool of certainty. Try on my Certainty Shoes and you better believe they are funky and sparkly.

My heart is pounding with a nervous, excited energy and that always happens to me before delicious things come.

So here's to trying new things on this journey of mine!

48 Comments:

Blogger Kathleen said...

denise...i am so excited for you. i can feel the energy through your words.

wierd. as i was reading this, i was waiting for liam's first-ever serving of scrambled egg to cool. maybe a sign of the nurturing and new life about to happen...we are all connected in this journey of life.

i am going to go feed him his first bite and say a prayer for you and your boho-boy. i want this so very badly for you, sister.

lovelovelove.

April 29, 2008 at 3:57:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Schmoops said...

i love you
i love you
i love you

this post makes me want to throw my hand in the air and wave them like i just don't care.

you are teaching me how to manifest in my life as well.

you rock the funky and sparkly shoes.

xoxo

April 29, 2008 at 4:29:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous kikimarie said...

good for you

April 29, 2008 at 4:49:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

BoHo I can ''feel'' it IS going to happen for you... my DIL always says ''how does your skin feel MIL'' when any changes could occur :) with LoVe CaroleXXXOOO Ps i''m usually right heehee XXOO

April 29, 2008 at 4:56:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Ames said...

Your last few posts have been filled with such optimism and hope, it feels like you have crossed to the sunny side of the road and you're revelling in it's warmth!
Sending positive and fertile vibes your way, I have always felt your story would have a happy ending!

April 29, 2008 at 5:05:00 PM PDT  
Blogger PixieDust said...

No Negative Nellies here! You. Will. Be. Pregnant. Sending you all the karma my little corner of the universe can muster - yay!

:-D

(((HUGS)))!

April 29, 2008 at 5:17:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Allison M said...

You will be pregnant. I believe.

April 29, 2008 at 5:22:00 PM PDT  
Blogger LeS said...

You've got this girl!
And I suggest you buy an ACTUAL pair of sparkly shoes to put on. Dance in 'em. Sing in 'em. Feel the Certainty in 'em...and wear double buns. And red lipstick, too :)
HOORAY.

April 29, 2008 at 5:27:00 PM PDT  
Blogger LeS said...

OH MY GOSH - maybe shoes like these ?!?!
http://www.jcrew.com/catalog/product.jhtml?id=prod88557173&catId=cat90244
hee.

April 29, 2008 at 5:31:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You. Will. Be. Pregnant.

And? A fabulous, FABULOUS mom!!

April 29, 2008 at 5:46:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Heather! said...

Those feelings are so true. I felt it with all three of mine from the very earliest moments. You know, you just now. Enjoy this magical time.

April 29, 2008 at 6:06:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I truly believe you when you say that you will be pregnant, I can envision it, promise you will post lots of pregnancy pictures, I love to see those!

April 29, 2008 at 6:28:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Fran said...

I am so happy for you. I wanted to jump for joy. I can tell that you believe it. I am going to keep believing for you too.

April 29, 2008 at 6:30:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

well, of course you will get pregnant silly! = )

xxoo aruna

April 29, 2008 at 7:19:00 PM PDT  
Blogger nap girl said...

dear denise,
i have not commented in sooooo long but have held you in my prayers all the while. i feel your relaxed and jubulent spirit so strongly in this post i just had to drop you a line. dancing in alaska in my own sparklies for you sweet boho girl.
ox kelley kelley

April 29, 2008 at 8:30:00 PM PDT  
Blogger puananim said...

You will be pregnant. Make sure your funky, sparkly shoes are a half size bigger than your present size, because your feet will grow when you are pregnant.

April 29, 2008 at 9:10:00 PM PDT  
Blogger pERiWinKle said...

oh Sweetie, to truly believe with every cell in your body...magical! Faith! Believe! I think this would be what God speak of when He says you have to believe in the things you cannot really see.

Inspirational to me? Yes!

Oeeeeee!!!! So excited!

Hope..."Wish"....Magical...Miracle...Beauty....Faith..which one will be baby's name :-)

Trusting and believing with you! xx

April 29, 2008 at 10:45:00 PM PDT  
Blogger pen said...

way to go!! you so WILL be pregnant! and you will be the yummiest mummy there is! can't wait to see this wonderful new journey of yours transpire! xxx

April 30, 2008 at 1:51:00 AM PDT  
Blogger kelly said...

blessed, i.will.be.pregant. journey. your spunk gives me such
motivation.

April 30, 2008 at 4:17:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Christine said...

Its been a long time since I left a comment but I read you religiously.....you are inspirational in all your glory. You.Will.Be.Pregnant and you will make a fabulous Mama.
Christine

April 30, 2008 at 5:37:00 AM PDT  
Blogger tammy said...

sweet denise~

sending you loads of love and magical positive thoughts!

it feels so good to *hear* you sounding so happy and empowered.

you are an inspiration.

xoxo from my heart to yours~

praying, hoping, wishing, and believing right along with you.

love~ tammy

April 30, 2008 at 6:07:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Abra said...

You have the most gorgeous and infectious smile.

April 30, 2008 at 7:33:00 AM PDT  
Blogger tricia said...

I am so excited for you. I have been reading your blogs for the last year and I have always thought you would be an awesome mama. I just know that good things are in store for you. You will have that baby you always dreamed of and it will be even ten times more special because of the road you have traveled.

Trish

April 30, 2008 at 7:39:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Alex S said...

Andrea will have to make a little tiny Superhero necklace for your little one!

April 30, 2008 at 8:19:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Winston Churchill once said that "success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm"

it is apparent that you want this baby as you have not lost the enthusiasm to try again and again and again and i honour this.

you are a truly miraculous being!

April 30, 2008 at 9:59:00 AM PDT  
Blogger QuackMeHard said...

I'll take a pair of your certainty shoes in every color, please! :-)

I love that you're positive again. I got goosie bumps reading this!!! AND I'M SO EXCITED!!!!!

(I love goosie bumps)

April 30, 2008 at 10:14:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Lisa said...

You. Will.

April 30, 2008 at 11:39:00 AM PDT  
Blogger dreamergirl said...

denise, there is such a magical vibe coming from your words. i believe in manifesting things and therefor believe that you will get pregnant, I'm so excited for you!

sending you much love,

silvia

April 30, 2008 at 12:34:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous andrea scher said...

So proud of you girl.

April 30, 2008 at 12:58:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous michele hoffman said...

i am a believer!
i believe in a preggo boho!!

blessing on your head!! (& your belly!)

~michele

April 30, 2008 at 1:18:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Glo said...

I will say a little prayer for you...you are such a beautiful soul and will make a wonderful Momma. God bless you and Boho Daddy!!!!

xo Glo

April 30, 2008 at 1:22:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

babies come when they are ready!
bearing life is magic you see with your eyes. it is nice to see in your words that your time has arrived.
here's to happy baby making.

i have a bit of witchy poo powers and visions and i have always seen a little beautiful angelic baby boy coming to you. a hippy boy with big brown eyes and a heart of gold.

peace & love to you~

April 30, 2008 at 1:46:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous kelsie said...

Yes, you will!

I believe!

April 30, 2008 at 2:24:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Honey said...

You. Will. Be. Pregnant. You. Will. Be. A. Mother. Of that I am certain. The kind of certainty that resides in the bones, heart, pulses, gut, grey matter. It is the destiny of your DNA.

April 30, 2008 at 2:43:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous krista said...

sister- when you get pregnant we are gonna crash you site with the boatloads of congratulations and felicitations we'll be sending your way.

April 30, 2008 at 4:49:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Thea Coughlin said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

April 30, 2008 at 4:50:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Thea Coughlin said...

that was me deleting before love. I made a terrible spelling error. hee hee

I am dancing and clapping over here.....wonderful, wonderful beautiful dreams are lined up happening right now from all your manifesting powers.....you rockin rockstar, superhero you.

Love and snuggles t2t
XOXOXOXO

April 30, 2008 at 4:53:00 PM PDT  
Blogger gem said...

love, love, love this!
xoxo,
gem

April 30, 2008 at 5:04:00 PM PDT  
Blogger all over the map said...

holding you up in positive thoughts and prayer.
your approach is really wonderful and nobody can rain on your parade, no one!
i firmly believe having good, positive thoughts nurtures your soul and negative ones suck the very life right out of you. so keep those certainty shoes laced up girlie.
can't wait to read the announcement someday (soon) that a little boho is growing inside your bellie.
xo

April 30, 2008 at 5:53:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yay, denise! totally beautiful and totally exciting!! what a sweet invitation you are sending out. keep talking to that baby spirit! your courage is incredibly inspiring. xo katherine

April 30, 2008 at 7:33:00 PM PDT  
Blogger megg said...

I love you.

I believe you.
I believe IN you!

I love you!!!

GggrooooowwwwllllllLLLLL!!!!

May 1, 2008 at 12:06:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous Susan said...

I am so proud of you for taking this new stance! And yes, it works!
You will be pregnant! :)

May 1, 2008 at 5:40:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous Micheline said...

I've been reading your blog for a while but I've never commented before. It goes without saying that you've had a rough go of it in the last little while but here you are: confident, brave and ready to take it on. This is a side of you that I don't think I've seen yet and I love it. You are an inspiration for all of us.

Sending love and good wishes.
Micheline

May 1, 2008 at 6:30:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous Glo said...

One more thing...

Just want to say that I love coming to your blog Denise because I come across such wonderful magical souls who give off such a great vibe. It's nice to know that there are people like you all in the world because when you turn on the tube or read the papers these days, frankly, I feel discouraged w/ the world my boys are inheriting.

Let's build a village & move there...hee...hee... :)

xo glo

May 1, 2008 at 9:41:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous Megan said...

i'm so happy for you!!

I always feel better when I read your words. For some reason, you speak straight to my soul. I want this for myself so badly!

I hear you.
I hear you
I hear you.

I just don't know if I can say the words just yet.

But I'm SOOOO glad you can, because your energy is like a thousand voices shouting to the sky's and I can feel it all the way in Florida!
xoxo

May 1, 2008 at 7:58:00 PM PDT  
Anonymous Kerilyn said...

I am SURE SURE SURE you've already heard and watched or read this.. but You should put in "The Secret" and let it soak into you... It's all about this... believing it as it has ALREADY HAPPENED!!!!

As I think.. so shall I be.

You already are pregnant!!! YOU ARE!!!

May 2, 2008 at 12:34:00 PM PDT  
Blogger jenica said...

you ARE a mother. a rockin', lovin', happy mother.

xoxo

May 3, 2008 at 8:17:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Jacks said...

You. Are. A. Mama.

Love your words, as usual.

May 4, 2008 at 6:06:00 PM PDT  

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