dream*

charlie (photo session), canon digital rebel xti

I had a dream last night that I was sitting on a velvet couch at a cafe. My mind was interlaced with the book I was reading and the table in front of me to the left. There was a male psychic giving a reading to a woman. He had long gray hair and a peppered beard. I thought I remember him wearing a cloak.

My head was down and I heard him say in my direction;
"Excuse me, ma'am..." in an authoritative voice.

I looked up at him and he was pointing at me with white gloves on. He asked;
"How old are you?"

I answered;
"36"
and simultaneously, he answered his own question with "37".

"Well, not really", I replied..."I'll be 37 in a few weeks."

He then said;
"You're going to have a baby."

I felt my eyes get larger and my mouth slightly open. The woman he was giving the reading to jerked her head my way with a huge smile. But he didn't smile. He had such a serious look on his face, almost exasperated, like he knew that he would have to convince me.

He continued;
"You'll need to take care of that round belly of yours and make sure to keep it in there for 9 or 10 months."

Then he turned around and went about the reading with this woman. I sat there stunned. How could this man even know my story? Something deep inside me didn't question this gift. I knew I needed this reassurance so badly. I knew I needed it now in particular, as I have been feeling myself slip into sorrow and impatience.

As I gathered my things and brushed crumbs off of my skirt, I walked over to their table and put my hand on his shoulder. Tears welled up in my eyes and I felt like if I didn't say what I wanted to say in a quick fashion, I would have fell to my knees with weepy gratitude.

"You have no idea how much I needed to hear this...thank you."

I saw a kindness fill up in his eyes that slightly washed away the abrasiveness I first felt from him. As I walked away, I heard his last words trail after me...

"This child is going to be very special, you know."

And I walked away knowing. Knowing that this must be the reason why our baby is taking so long to get here. There must be a specific purpose to their life.

I know this was a dream but rarely do I remember my wild dreams each night with such detail. I still can see this mans face so clearly. I still can feel the myriad of emotions I felt while sitting on that velvet couch. And I still believe what I felt walking out of that coffee shop. The reassurance from his words didn't fade away as I opened my eyes to stare at the indigo walls in our bedroom this morning.