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Thursday, December 18

the boho cure*


me a few hours ago post nose piercing, taken with my camera phone

Last night I had a mommy meltdown. Just sooo tired and premenstrual and unable to calm my poor crying baby (for hours all night long).

So I brought him into my sleeping husband and he saw it on my face and swooped our son up and let me be.

Then I curled up into a ball and cried and bit my nails, while Boho Boy rocked the babes to sleep.

There it was. My first sleep deprived meltdown. I was told it may happen at 3 weeks.

Then I woke up this morning and Omi said to go take a few hours of "me" time outside of the house. She must have seen that I was feeling fragile and guilty and uncertain and confused.

So I gave her a kiss and Cedar a kiss and I went out.

And I drove to one of my favorite beach towns and I got my nose pierced.

And that is all it took.
I felt like me again.
I went home with newly pierced nose and held and rocked my schmook,
and kissed him all over and watched him sleep.

Just a simple nose ring did the trick for me.
It's the boho way...

But in all honesty, it is that reminder that all mommies need to not be afraid to ask for help and to take a deep breath (preferably fresh air) and do something that reminds them of who they are outside of being a mommy.

Bless sweet Omi and my dear husband for being sensitive to what I need.

I think Cedar likes my piercing. He keeps staring at my sparkly nose.

; )

54 Comments:

Blogger Georgia said...

Love the pierced nose! i wish I still had mine :)

xoxo

December 18, 2008 at 5:39:00 PM PST  
Blogger Puanani said...

Oh my, I pierced my nose just after my daughter was born. It made me feel a little like I hadn't lost my edge as a funky women. Time away from your crying babe is always the ticket. I always returned feeling better and stronger and more capable. You look so great and happy!

December 18, 2008 at 5:50:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love it! Thank you for being such an honest and inspirational mom (and woman)!

Amy

December 18, 2008 at 6:06:00 PM PST  
Blogger Janet said...

it looks really good on you!

December 18, 2008 at 6:07:00 PM PST  
Blogger Louise said...

LOVE it!
I got mine when my kids were really young they don't even notice it and once in a while it catches them off guard. My nephew used to always point at it when he was really little and say 'bawl'...
Anyway you are gorgeous girl! Totally you!

The pics of Cedar are GORGEOUS!

December 18, 2008 at 6:17:00 PM PST  
Blogger Lymie Lisa said...

I love it! You look fantastic. I'm glad you got some "me" time and came back feeling refreshed.

December 18, 2008 at 6:25:00 PM PST  
Blogger christianne said...

Oh my gosh, that is pure awesomeness. I couldn't stop giggling as I read this post. "It is the Boho way" said it all.

The picture of you is adorable. The nose ring looks spectacular on you! It was also fun to see the way your car is spiffed out Cedar-style. :)

December 18, 2008 at 6:30:00 PM PST  
Blogger Schmoops said...

perfect! it looks so yummy on you.
xo

December 18, 2008 at 6:33:00 PM PST  
Blogger lexiloo said...

awesome! you rock woman!

December 18, 2008 at 6:51:00 PM PST  
Anonymous piper said...

looks soooo good! you are a beauty!

December 18, 2008 at 7:01:00 PM PST  
Blogger Maggie Ann. said...

oh this is just so perfect. i look up to you so much, you are an inspiration!

December 18, 2008 at 7:13:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Chookooloonks said...

Your nose was MADE for piercing. It looks great.

December 18, 2008 at 7:54:00 PM PST  
Blogger Juneau.Eco.Mommie said...

must be a mommy thing, because I am getting mine done next week! So happy for you and your little nest.

December 18, 2008 at 8:17:00 PM PST  
Blogger Karen Maezen Miller said...

You dainty thing you. Me, I went out and had my head, I mean my hair, chopped off.

December 18, 2008 at 8:21:00 PM PST  
Blogger CelticBuffy said...

Gorgeous! My tattoo and my navel piercing had similar effects on me.

December 18, 2008 at 8:27:00 PM PST  
Blogger dreamergirl said...

It looks perfect on you!
Love it :)

December 18, 2008 at 9:17:00 PM PST  
Anonymous kea said...

Wow i envy your newly pierced nose :) My husband won't let me get mine pierced :(

But i just wanted to say that sometimes you have to get away, you love your baby with all your heart but you do need some alone time. I had a baby 4 months ago and very much like you i went through several long years of infertility. I got pregnant in May 07 and lost the baby, i was so lost and mad. But Dec 26, 07 we found out that we were pg again! I couldn't let myself be happy until i knew everything was okay. But here i am with a gorgeous sweet lovable baby girl. I wanted and loved this baby so much but i cried and and was so sleep deprived that i didn't know what to do when she came. I would beg my husband not to leave me and go to work. Sometimes just getting out and being alone helps. I didn't feel like myself after i had her. It's odd how that happens! But take time for yourself it helps and things will get better with being sleep deprived and everything else that comes when these precious bundles of joy come into your life. I could not wait til my girlie got some age on her but now i would freeze time if i could!

You are such an inspirational person to me and i'm sorry for the long post, but i have always meant to leave a post and never have. But i think you and your husband are awesome!

December 18, 2008 at 9:32:00 PM PST  
Blogger heather l murphy said...

that is awesome!
You look like a totally beautiful and radiant boho mama!

December 18, 2008 at 9:51:00 PM PST  
Blogger lilia said...

Awww...you rock. And, yes, three weeks in is just about the breaking point. Sounds like you have lots of support on the reminding-you-to-take-care-of-yourself front, and don't ever be ashamed to accept it...it makes us non-mamas feel so fulfilled and useful and amazingly *needed*. :-) xoxo, Lilia

December 18, 2008 at 11:33:00 PM PST  
Blogger tan!a said...

Yeah!

"… do something that reminds them of who they are outside of being a mommy"

Such a great idea of you, to do something to feel 'you' again.

It looks nice your nose piercing.

Tania

December 19, 2008 at 12:44:00 AM PST  
Blogger kristen said...

it looks fantastic, like it's always been pierced. it toally suits you...watch out, now you'll be getting inked, heehee, maybe a cedar tree? hehehee.

December 19, 2008 at 3:05:00 AM PST  
Blogger Imelda said...

Very nice Denise!

I'm giving some thought to a piercing too. I've always put it off as it meant I couldn't donate blood for 6 months. However, my iron levels are shot so I can't donate anyway so now would be a good time to go fir it.

Also want to dye my hair a deep pink/red colour. LOL... What's going on with me?

December 19, 2008 at 4:07:00 AM PST  
Blogger the camp said...

i dig it!
i went back on my birthday and had it redone!

hang in there....take time as you need.

December 19, 2008 at 4:57:00 AM PST  
Blogger Tammy said...

"It's the Boho way" is the greatest sentence ever! :)

I had to scroll up and look at the picture again because your nose piercing just looks so natural - like it's always been there! Yay! Awesome!

I love mine - I've had it done for going on 7 or 8 years now. I wore a blue stone in it recently for our wedding for my something blue! :)

December 19, 2008 at 5:06:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Been there! Good for you for taking care of yourself. It took me years and three children to learn that it is incredibly important FOR our kids that we take care of ourselves. You would think it would be an obvious thing?!

Susie

December 19, 2008 at 5:12:00 AM PST  
Blogger Lisa said...

Fabulous! This mentality will not only sustain you but will allow you to be fully present and give fully to Boho Boy and Cedar. You are so wise to have recognized this early on...it took me almost two years. I think I'm finally getting the hang of it and things are so much better.

December 19, 2008 at 5:35:00 AM PST  
Anonymous satori17@yahoo.com said...

it looks beautiful! but watch out, you may have 20 piercings and a few tattoos before the next year is out.
babies change everything....
i have realized that you just have to own it, realize it and be one with it. life changes the moment that baby is put in your arms.

i do miss my old life, my old self, my old bohemian experiences. but there are new ones, new ways, mommy ways. life just morphs into a whole new thing!

you will be fine, we all are!
xo

December 19, 2008 at 6:27:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

response to kea's comment - My husband won't let me get mine pierced :(

absolutely NO-ONE can tell you what you can or cannot do - we are free to be who and what we want - choice is your right

he is lucky you call him 'husband'

December 19, 2008 at 6:41:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Rebecca F. said...

I had that melt down too, where I took my sweet and screaming baby to my husband and said "I can't do this anymore. It doesn't feel okay at all."

Good for you for having the self awareness and strength to ask for help. Mommyhood is tough but oh so incredibly worth it.

Hugs to you and your nosepierced self!!

December 19, 2008 at 7:19:00 AM PST  
Blogger Jamie said...

I LOVE this post....so open and honest and completely vulnerable! :) I got tears in my eyes and then I laughed. I've been wanting to get my nose pierced for a long time (hubs isn't on board with it) ~ but I could see myself doing the same thing! :)
I'm so glad you "feel" better. ;)
You are a wonderful mommy!

December 19, 2008 at 7:31:00 AM PST  
Blogger The Whole Self said...

good for you mama!

so WEIRD though..i woke up this morning all like "i need to get my nose repierced". i couldn't explain it but it was just something i needed to do. unfortunately my state is shut down due to a state of emergency because of an impending snow storm, and oh yeah...i'm preggers and nobody will pierce a pregnant mama. so instead i went out, got a delicious drink treat, then went to whole foods and fondled things. and i bought myself a really rockin' hippie hat, which i'm wearing now. so hopefully that will tide me over until my babe arrives...

hugs to you!

December 19, 2008 at 7:51:00 AM PST  
Blogger Eileen W. said...

Your new nose ring piercing is beautiful!! Sparkly and refreshing - just what you needed after a meltdown. xoxo

December 19, 2008 at 8:05:00 AM PST  
Blogger sufferingsummer said...

a perfect way to bring you back to yourself...I always feel we are much better Mamas when we don't feel like crazy sleep deprived, lacking in all coherent thought, aliens.
The nose is lovely.
So are you.

December 19, 2008 at 8:29:00 AM PST  
Blogger meesh said...

my boys are 14 and 10 now. but i can clearly remember that super tired sleep deprived time with each of them.

it can feel like they will stay this small forever but they do not. they grow so quickly.

i remember thinking a few days after my first baby was born how much it takes to keep this tiny human alive. i never really knew how many things i could do in a single day.

no one ever really tells you how much you will be doing to sustain your new babe. it's the biggest job ever.

also the best most rewarding job ever!

you are doing great denise! you are an awesome mom!

peace,

meesh

www.michelegoldstein.com

December 19, 2008 at 8:30:00 AM PST  
Blogger pERiWinKle said...

Just look at the girly-giggle* in your eyes! Love you xx

December 19, 2008 at 8:41:00 AM PST  
Blogger turquoise cro said...

Cute Boho gal! My firstborn had colic really bad, we had to go out and get some Italian tea!!! I don't know whether or not they still have that or not! Poor Damon had that colic BAD!!! UG! I HOPE Cedar doesn't get it! Phew! Fresh air ALWAYS helps!!! Glad YOU got out a bit!

December 19, 2008 at 9:14:00 AM PST  
Anonymous jen gray said...

that's my girl!
xoxo

December 19, 2008 at 9:21:00 AM PST  
Anonymous Sarah said...

I'm not sure if anyone has told you about the Happiest Baby magic.... Here's a video of a parent using the technique: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WkR_e1L6zxI

and here is the official site for the book: http://www.thehappiestbaby.com/

Yeah, I pretty much felt like this technique saved me when I brought home my little guy. Definitely worth looking into. It really is like magic!

p.s. The nose looks fantastic!

December 19, 2008 at 10:08:00 AM PST  
Blogger Swirly said...

Perfect.

December 19, 2008 at 12:19:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm also a big fan of 'The Happiest Baby on the Block'. I heard about it from a friend 5+ years ago and ordered the DVD when our daughter was 3 weeks old. It was amazing to see the techniques used and to add them to our 'bag of tricks' for soothing our wee one. They were so effective and we all felt more peaceful. Now we're on our 3rd happy baby and I've passed the DVD on to 5 friends as shower gifts, making them promise to share the wisdom with their friends, too. ;)
best wishes,
Whitney

December 19, 2008 at 12:38:00 PM PST  
Blogger gem said...

gorgeous.
xo,
gem

December 19, 2008 at 12:39:00 PM PST  
Blogger jin said...

You are so adorable!
(the word verification below is 'wings'!)

December 19, 2008 at 1:17:00 PM PST  
Anonymous francie pants said...

Bless your heart! The piercing brings me back. My roomate and I had a tradition... when everything was falling down around us and we had tried everything to fix it, we would go to our favorite piercer and just let him pick a pretty spot on our nose or ear and do his thing. The quick rush of endorphines sort of centered us again and allowed us to move forward accepting what we could change and what we would just have to let be. You don't know me dear. But I've followed your journey for a while now. The three of you are in my prayers and thoughts often.

December 19, 2008 at 1:50:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

so funny - i have my nose earings on my dresser waiting for post baby piercing! it was that or a mommy tattoo! xoxo debra

December 19, 2008 at 1:56:00 PM PST  
Blogger Vivienne said...

how beautiful! it really suits you!

December 19, 2008 at 4:44:00 PM PST  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

boho girl,
you are a GORGEOUS mommy. i mean it. you look so beautiful, and the happiness of motherhood is shining through. :)

December 19, 2008 at 6:22:00 PM PST  
Anonymous shelly said...

Denise, you have that new mommy glow...

December 19, 2008 at 9:51:00 PM PST  
Blogger QuackMeHard said...

i got my navel pierced about 3 weeks after having my muffin. my belly had returned to normal within 2 days, but i still felt.... blah... So I did something about it! rock on!

the nose ring looks GORGEOUS on you! I couldn't pull it off. :-)

December 20, 2008 at 5:40:00 AM PST  
Blogger Cage Free Family said...

Love it! I too had my nose pierced when my first was a wee little bit.
Mommy melt downs are just part of beautiful growing experience. :-)
xo

December 20, 2008 at 8:03:00 AM PST  
Blogger .E. said...

its funny getting my nose pierced was one of the best things I have done for myself in ages.. it made me feel like me again too..

December 20, 2008 at 10:25:00 AM PST  
Blogger Beth said...

wow...the only thing I ever did "on those days" was to leave the house for a pedicure...I never even thought of a nose piercing !!

and that rebel like look in your eyes...precious !!!

December 20, 2008 at 12:59:00 PM PST  
Blogger kirsten said...

so cute & so you!! it's as though it was meant to be there. more power to you, boho mama!! ;o)

December 21, 2008 at 8:57:00 AM PST  
Blogger liz elayne said...

it really looks fantastic!
so glad that you are taking care of you...

blessings,
liz

December 21, 2008 at 1:16:00 PM PST  
Blogger Gypsy Alex said...

Love that cute nose of yours! Miss you! Enjoying everything you are sharing ~ deeply loving every bit of you and your sweet boho family! Cedar is just purrrfect! Perfect! xxox

December 23, 2008 at 10:44:00 AM PST  

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